Am I gay?

This is a question that in the end only you can answer.

Lots of people who are lesbian, gay or bisexual will tell you that they knew from when they were very young but for some people it’s not so clear cut.

One of the main things to realise is that it is OK to be unsure about how you feel.

Being gay or lesbian means you are attracted to and/or may have sexual feelings for people of the same sex as yourself. If you are bisexual you may have these feelings for members of either sex. You may have same sex encounters or relationships whilst you explore your sexuality, but this does not mean that you are definitely gay, lesbian, bisexual or straight.

Similarly if you have ever had same sex experiences that were against your will or if you have had dreams or fantasies about members of the same sex, this does not necessarily mean that you are gay. You might feel that you’re the only one questioning your sexuality, but be reassured that there are people all over the world feeling the same way as you.

A good place to start is by attending a gay youth group or joining the LGB society at university, which are both great places to meet new friends and get involved in the gay community.

Coming out

Telling people about your sexuality is called coming out.

You don’t have to tell anyone you’re lesbian, gay or bisexual if you don’t want to but you might feel happier if you can be honest about who you really are.

A good idea is to start by telling someone you really trust, and who you know will be supportive. It might also be helpful to get an idea about people’s attitudes towards sexuality before you talk to them.

Lots of people that you tell will be really positive and will be proud of you for telling them, they might even be flattered that you trust them enough to tell them. Sadly not everyone will be so positive and supportive. You should be prepared for some negative reactions and understand that this may be a difficult thing for some people to understand or come to terms with.

Ultimately there is no right or wrong way to come out. The important thing is to do it the way you want to and the way you feel comfortable.